Five years ago when I found out I would become a mom…I had no idea what that would mean for me…for my child…for my sanity.
People were shocked (family and friends) to here that I…KIM JOHNSON-Brimhall…would be having a child. Not because I was wreckless or anything…but because I was a determined, academic oriented person. I was that straight A girl…gifted and talented…Advanced placement programs…Loved everyone at school…tried to stay drama free….because I had a plan to leave Arkansas…and I did. I loved/love school and that was my plan…to finish college and to be a Big Time journalist. I pictured myself living in a loft in downtown of a big city.
But at age 22…I was married and was going to be a mother…and I had already been told that I would have problem pregnancies…and I did…so that meant no school. I was devastated.
Jade was born and a year later Madi Kay came along. And my life was changed in ways I could have never known.
Life was changing so fast…I had no idea how I suddenly became a mother (well I know HOW> i took health) but it was so crazy fast.
Lately I have been getting many emails and comments referring to me as "one cool moma" or the "hip mom" and asking how I am so comfortable in being who I am…if people treat me different because I choose dresses with boots rather than T-shirts and jeans.
Let’s not get it twisted…there are some who feel I am not the "traditional mom" and I am certain are bothered by my approach.
But one thing that I have always believed…is what works for one person…doesn’t necessarily work for another. It’s usually obvious when a person is not being themselves…when they "adopt" someone else’s persona and it catches up with them. This is something I would expect of children…but not mothers. We have to know who we are to be able to lead our children. Which is why I would never expect another mom to act as I do. You have to be you and forget everyone else around you. I mean if that’s what we want to teach our kids…shouldn’t we live it too? People know genuine…I am a people reader and I have become amazed at how people feel they can not be themselves for fear of not being accepted.
I spent about two years living a life being someone other people told me I should be. Being the mother I was told was "expected." Feeling as though I was less of a mother because my child didn’t wear a onesie under each outfit…or didn’t wear socks in our house during the winter…I mean come on now.
What a waste. I believe that you should be confident enough in who you are to step out on that limb and take chances KNOWING that sometimes you are gonna make mistakes…and I have allowed that to be my montra for motherhood too.
We are not all born knowing EXACTLY what to do when we become moms…but we can learn by trial and error and allow it to make us better mothers, therefore making our children better people too.
I do not consider myself a "hip" moma. I consider myself the mom I have always longed to be…just with some bumps along the way. I like taking photos of my children…but I also LOVE taking photos of myself…so that’s that. I like making things that I love…even if other’s don’t. I like talking my children to do activities that are character building rather than forcing them to do something they hate…I believe in spending my money on adding to who they are as people, not their toybox. Now don’t think Im a toy nazi…my kids have toys:)
I got an email last night from a girl saying she lost herself after having a baby…and she is having a hard time getting to an inspired, uplifted place.
I believe we have to create that person…just like "creating" art.
Layer upon layer, we add things we like, get rid of the things that don’t work for us…stay true to our own design…in our personality and our life. We choose.
I know a lot of cool moms out there…and women I know will be awesome moms someday as well. I am constantly inspired by women having a voice…stepping out of the BOX…and stepping into themselves.
If you’ve made it through this novel…I applaud you:)
I will now be stepping off my soap-box…its not becoming of me…but I just had to get that out:)